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How can we get replace bad morals with good morals?

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In a Nutshell: It is encouraged to constantly work on oneself in order to improve one's moral qualities and get closer to God. In this response we will see some advice for a Muslim who wishes to get rid of bad morals and acquire good morals.

Morality

Firstly, good character weighs heavily in the balance of deeds on the Day of Judgment. He who has the best character will be closest to the Messenger of Allah on the Day of Judgment (Tirmidhi, 2018). According to Jabar, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said:

"Surely, those of you whom I love the most and who will be settled closer to me on the Day of Resurrection are those of you who have the best character."(Tirmidhi)

The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) also said:

"The best of you are those with the best character." (Sahih al-Bukhari, 6035; Muslim, 2321)

The Shafi'i jurist Imam Nawawi stated:

"The hadith advocates the acquisition of good character and explains the virtue possessed by one who achieves it because it is a quality of Allah's prophets and His saints."

Whilst Qadi Iyadh observed:

"It is the companionship of people, their affection, the adoption of an attitude towards them marked by tenderness, tolerance, mercy, endurance in times of difficulty, the abandonment of the manifestation of pride and superiority complex, and the avoidance of treating them with harshness, anger and a spirit of revenge."

Secondly, mistreating one's father and mother is one of the major sins. Whoever commits it will not know happiness either in this world or in the Hereafter. It is the duty of Muslims to treat their fathers and mothers well and to stay away from anything that arouses their anger, especially disobedience or breaking up with them.

Thirdly, it is possible to improve and perfect one's character by the following means:

  • Knowledge of good character and the reward it generates in this world and the Hereafter;
  • Knowledge of bad character and its consequences in terms of retribution and bad effects;
  • Reading the biographies of the pious ancestors and the conditions of the good;
  • Avoiding anger, adorning oneself with patience and learning to control oneself and avoid haste;
  • To join the company of people of good character and to keep away from people of bad character;
  • To train oneself to acquire a good character, to get used to it and to practice it with patience. In this regard, a poet says: "Learn to be generous and make it a habit." You will never see a generous person who has not learned to be generous.

Finally, ask Allah to help improve your character as the Prophet (pbuh) used to say in his du'a:

"Lord, you have given me a beautiful physique. Give me a beautiful character." (Ahmad, 24392)

When one stumbles and shows bad character in a given situation, he must be quick to apologise and repair what he has damaged and resolve to make amends. When he improves his character, he does so in order to comply with the command of Allah , to obtain His approval by following the example of the Messenger of Allah. This is how he should behave in all his practices. He does not improve his character so that people will praise him, for then he would deprive himself of the reward and deserve punishment for having given in to hypocrisy.

Just as the Muslim should strive to be sincere in all his acts of servitude, so should he behave in the same way when he seeks to improve his character. In doing so, let him be concerned with the order he has received from Allah, the examination of accounts, the scales, heaven and hell. Let him know that people will not be able to use him or harm him in any way. Remembering the Hereafter is one of the most important factors that help the Muslim to remain sincere to Allah the Most High.

Fourth, here are some things that help us to treat fathers and mothers well:

  • Knowledge of their rights, their merits and the sacrifices they have made to ensure a happy life;
  • Knowing the religious texts that exhort us to treat our fathers and mothers well and encourage us to behave in this way, as well as the texts that warn us against mistreating them and explain the consequences in terms of punishment in this world and in the hereafter;
  • Knowing that the good treatment of one's father and mother is one of the most important causes of obtaining the same treatment from one's own children and that their mistreatment leads to the same behaviour from the children of the perpetrator;
  • Study the biographies of pious people to learn about the good treatment they gave their fathers and mothers;
  • Read books and treatises on the good treatment and abuse of fathers and mothers and listen to religious lectures on the subject;
  • Giving gifts, saying nice words, putting on a happy face, making invocations and paying homage to them, all of which are part of the good treatment of parents.

Conclusion

Getting rid of bad morals and adorning oneself with good morals requires constant effort and a sincere intention to improve oneself. By following the teachings of Islam, asking God for forgiveness, cultivating good morals and avoiding bad influences, the Muslim can gradually improve his or her moral qualities and come closer to God.


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